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Ego

Some people have big egos. Like "so and so, who did so and so." That upsets me.

Part of you wants freedom. Another part still keeps patching up the crumbling walls of your prison.

If you do not like someone, very well, stay away. But the habit of gossiping and denigrating people behind their backs does not serve freedom. That is indulging in ego. That is the wrong work of the emotional center.

Spiritually speaking, other people’s egos are not of any concern. You spend time concerned with other people’s egos while being unaware of the workings of your own.

In your case, although you are attuned to arrogance, you do not have a chief feature of arrogance. It might be your second feature, like it is for so many people.

You have a chief feature of greed and that is why having no money hurts so much more for you. You feel powerless, weak, less macho. Fearful of lack, be it money, sex, lack of having a female be dependent on you, power or whatever it is you feel compelled to accumulate. It is largely imaginary suffering unconsciously imitated from your father. But there it is, leaving you restless throughout your days and nights. And you think other people’s egos is a problem.

Before the prison walls can crumble completely we must become conscious of our own devils. We must know our own false personality clearly and sharply or else the feeling of unease never leaves because we keep thinking the problem is elsewhere. That is the sole reason why being conscious is a necessity in spiritual work. If we do not know our devils that unconsciousness will keep us bound.

Ego is not merely displaying superiority. Ego is being in a hurry, feeling inadequate, indulgence in extremes, feeling victimized, being unable to change one’s mind.

There are seven definite and distinct ways ego manifests. Learn yours. All that is required is awareness, correct objective knowledge and honesty.

Only consciousness of your own ego matters. And once that process runs its course that consciousness will not matter either, and fear will no longer bother you.

Tarot - The Devil
False Personality
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